Bad habits in children
About addiction of children to parents
The topic of conversation for parent meetings: “bad habits in children. What to do with them?”
This issue is relevant for parents of kindergarten age and Junior level students.
What is a “bad habit”?
Bad habit is a negative tendency that has become need and actions, in behavior. It is a pattern of behavior that prevent the child normally live and grow.
The most common bad habits is:
– thumb sucking or different subjects;
– obkushuvannya nails;
– picking your nose;
– swaying from side to side, etc.
Noticing your child’s bad habit, parents face a dilemma: to fight the habit, or leave it as is?
Paradoxically, the correct answer to both questions is “no”.
You can’t fight the habit, because it’s the result of some unmet need. But, on the other hand, the habit cannot be ignored, because it, again a result of some unmet need.
Thus, for the first time seeing that your child sucks his thumb or bites her nails do not make the baby remark. And especially do not use punitive measures type masania fingers mustard, whipping by hand and / or severe penalties. Tell yourself: “This is an occasion to reflect me as a parent about what is happening with my child”.
Proven bad habits disappear when met the need, the underlying.
What are the basic needs of the child?
The need for love, security, parental attention, respect
And if the child is not feeling loved, not feeling safe, if it lacks parental attention or respect from the moms and dads, it turns compensatory mechanisms(read “bad habits”). With their help, the child will try to settle their anxiety, lack of attention from adults, or overcome your fear.
Many parents have noticed as bedtime children suck their fingers and ask the question “What to do?” In response I would like to ask: “And how much time you give to the child?” If the child wants his mom or dad before bedtime or while going to sleep here with him( in this case the child is calm and feels bezopasnosti), and you for one reason or another denied him, he starts looking for a way to get the feeling of safety and comfort yourself. And thumb sucking, or corner cushions or ear favorite toy in this case fits perfectly – all this creates a situation of sucking the breast, near where the child can feel safe and warmed by love.
Another cause of bad habits( e.g. nail-biting) – the desire to reduce negative emotional experiences and relieve nervous tension.
If the child bites her nails, first check if they have it. A loose or flaking of the nail, often cause the child discomfort. To say about it he can’t, or forget, so the problem tends to resolve itself, biting off or chewed off delivers trouble elements.
If you believe that, biting the nails, the child drops the voltage, then:
1.Explain to your child. “discharge” is less self-injurious way(e.g., to shout in an empty room, kick a pillow, cry in the end).
2.Switch his attention to another activity to reservati disturbing the connection between his situation and her reaction to it.
3.Think about what can be linked to childhood experiences, and eliminate the cause.
Before we can understand why the kid picks his nose, remember three facts:
1.American scientists Jefferson and Thompson, conducting research on the topic of bad habits, got a questionnaire, which asked what kind of bad habits you notice, why and how often they are played? It was found that 91% of respondents like picking his nose. Moreover, 75% of them said that picked his nose almost every hour.
2.The nose is an organ for breathing and smelling. The inner surface of the nose is covered with epithelium, the surface of which is mucus. If the nasal mucosa is dry, trapped in the nose of even the smallest part of something sticks to the surface and interfere with the respiratory process. Therefore, the nasal cavity, you need to keep clean, and one way to do this is to “dig shrimp”
3.The little kids start to pick your nose, because they study your body. After examining your nose and its contents, they switch to other parts of his body.
On the basis of these three facts, we conclude:
a)you Pick your nose do not only children but also adults.(It is another matter. what adults do usually when they are alone).
b)If the child picks his nose, maybe he is just doing physiologically reasonable procedure cleans the spout. A drop of oil(sunflower, peach) inside and all problems. What if in the future there is a reason for discussion with the child about the finger in the nose, teach him how to use a scarf, and explain that this procedure is not done in the eyes of others.
C)If a young child’s nose clean and my finger still try-and-neck-maybe it’s time to examine the nose.
Negative experiences the child has arise because of parental quarrels, because of the lack of affection and expressions of love, because of continued austerity and vecinas bans.
Very often, bad habits appear when the child in a stressful situation for him, when excessive intellectual and physical activities, upon presentation of the child by parents ‘ excessive demands.
Remember:banning using threats and punishments to the child to suck his thumb, biting his nails, picking his nose, after a while you will notice that in place you eradicated habits. grew up new. the same or more harmful.
Therefore, if the child had a bad habit, proceed according to the following rules:
1.Try to understand the cause of the habit.
2.Don’t stop in ultimatum the child to behave properly.
3.Do not scold or punish your child in the moment when pravljenja bad habit.
4.Does not focus on his actions.
5.At the moment if there is a bad habit, try to turn the child’s attention to something else.
6.Surround the child with love and affection, not conflict with each other in the presence of a child.
7.Consider whether the intellectual and physical load capabilities of the child.