How to respond to the whims of a sick child?
He had a fever, his throat was red, nose, rash. And immediately fell anxieties and worries, bad mood, lowered his hands. “It would be better, I got sick!” Probably every mother knows this phrase, thrown into despair.
During illness crumbs (no matter what age!) parents are almost always faced with the question: “How to respond to whims?”. This is because the disease often makes the baby cranky, and his whims, quirks turn into tyranny against parents.
On the one hand, it is clear that if the child is sick, he needs more attention, affection and care. Mom should always be nearby, and not only because it is necessary from a medical point of view, but also because it genuinely sorry. You are near, because I sympathize with him and want to somehow ease his pain, anguish and suffering. How come they have strength and patience. You do not be lazy often to feed and change him, if he’s sweating. You are willing to do other beverage or food, if he shows his displeasure. You buy him a new toy, once again happy. You constantly and carefully inquire about his health.
However, on the other hand, children very quickly get used to such treatment. They very soon learn how to get pleasure from illness and to evoke the sympathy. As a result, their ability to independently solve their own problems does not develop, like a muscle, which is not in use. Fortunately, more than 90% of children’s diseases are classified as those, when in two days the child is on the mend. And as soon as parents stop worrying, they cease to indulge his exorbitant demands. After a minor conflict in the next couple of days relationships are back to normal.
But if the disease is delayed or there is a risk that it will recur, and the parents are overly worried, this atmosphere of heightened attention to the child may affect his character. (“That SendTo is too much”). Absorbing the anxiety of others, children tend to become more insistent in their demands, and behave like spoiled actors.
How can this be avoided?
From parents it is wiser to treat a sick child as well as usual. Keep yourself in hand, a word, an opinion not giving the child his emotion. Say as little as possible about the disease, treatment, procedures. Don’t sigh and complain wearily: “I got tired of all this! Yes when will it end?”. This reaction, unwittingly, You “run” your child has a mechanism of guilt and enter it in a state of psychological debt that is not conducive to promoting health.
If the child for a long time confined to bed rest, it is not necessary to focus his attention on what he was seriously ill. And although children have different tolerate bed rest, most can perfectly adapt to it without feeling of depression and melancholy. They may even due to the disease to develop ways to overcome pain and suffering. It all depends on how we, as adults, make their way of life.
Most importantly, never let them get sucked into it, otherwise then, when the time comes to stand up, can be a challenge. The child may become overly cautious. He timidly to listen to pain or even “invent” it. Remind him often that he will get well soon. Make plans, dream together about that time, when he gets rid of the limitations imposed by the disease, and can do anything he wants.
Entering the room to the child, look at him with a friendly, not a worried expression. Ask how he feels, tone, waiting rather good news than bad (and possibly only once a day!). If You see that the baby is hungry, then cook him something, but don’t ask ingratiating tone, like if he needed it. Don’t feed him forcibly. Don’t blackmail him, saying: “If you love me, you eat a little!” (except in those rare cases when it is recommended by the doctor).
If the child complains of pain, he should not say “okay”, “you only think”, “don’t be so silly,” etc. Better divert his attention breathing exercises (inhale and exhale for 4 accounts) – receiving more effective if the child is mentally considers himself. You can only “set the tone”, saying the phrase: “And with every breath and with every breath the pain calms down and disappears like mist”. As diversionary tools and can serve as a conversation about the benefits and usefulness of the pain, the troubles and ill health. In other words do whatever you want, just don’t pretend there is no pain. Teach the child how it should be treated.
Eventually, when the child begins to recover, mom definitely has to be a free time to take care of ourselves and relax. For the child now is better if the mother is not confined to his bed day and night and slows down the excessive demands and whims. Permissiveness during the illness will not bring anything good. Moreover, it can even scare a child. He might make the wrong conclusion that if he’s suddenly possible, it means that his case is really bad.
During a long illness in a child or adolescent can sometimes attack the longing and despair. In such moments it is better to throw away all the rules, to give him all their attention. Forget for a moment the cleaning, cooking, Laundry, etc. Do everything to cheer and cheer him. Writing out a prescription, doctors don’t prescribe LOVE just because to give it Your particular child can only be You.
And yet. The sick child must be your joys and surprises. Some tempting prospect (a small gift, book, arrival of friends, etc.).
To overcome the boredom, the child needs something else to do. Of course, you know the tastes and Hobbies of the little patient. It’s just that he always had the choice of lessons and not get tired of the primitive, and are not put off by the complexity. It can be new photos of a family photo album, paper cutting, drafting designer, mosaic or jigsaw puzzles, painting, weaving, sewing, beading, Assembly models, stamp collection, etc. the Child can always think of an occupation that will to develop it. Make sure that the child is not watched too much TV.
For children up to 3 years good different pyramids, not very complex for folding cubes pictures, small construction set, sets wooden or clay figurines, dolls, boxes with small items: large colorful buttons, coils, natural materials (acorns, shells). To sort, to arrange, to lay, strung – good calming exercise for a sick child.
Older children can give a mosaic, building blocks, a game that you can play alone (to drive the ball in a maze, to weave baskets, etc.). Love the children colored, different length rods, which folded figures. Widely use pencils and paper for the development of your baby’s imagination and creativity.
The most difficult thing may be the period when the child has recovered, but still not quite back to normal life. You should be patient to what he still needs special attention. At the same time, the kid needs to be allowed to lead a normal life as possible, expecting him reasonable behavior towards other family members and trying not to show (at least outwardly) of concern.