How to survive your first love?
Today I want to think about the theme first, unrequited love. Namely, how can parents help a teen who doesn’t know how to survive first love?
First love happens at the age of 13-16 years. Time in the life of a teenager and already fragile. But if the love is unrequited or comes the moment of the breakup – a long and painful experiences can not be avoided.
This is the case when parents can either win the favor of their child, providing him with proper support, or to hurt him even more.
Most of the parents watching the experiences of his child, trying to help, but often this “help” only makes things worse. What seems so insignificant with all those years, at the age of 14 seems to be the biggest tragedy. It is important to remember this always.
How to survive your first love? A few tips to help parents:
1 . Let the child calm and understanding. He must feel that he is safe that houses his love and ready to listen. During this period, the child is extremely important a feeling of a reliable backup that can only be provided by parents.
2 . Avoid popular councils, and it is these phrases:
“You’d better about studying so worried” – under any circumstances can not be opposed to learning and feelings. It’s not two mutually exclusive concepts, and individual spheres of life. Successful passing of examinations, admission to the UNIVERSITY does not guarantee that the child will be happy. For this harmonious personality characteristic of well-being in all areas of life.
“Yes, you have such as he(and another million will be” – a phrase is a fact that in your opinion the child made the wrong choice, that his feelings and the pain is negligible.
“We need to do so, and then he will realize who has lost” – such phrases cause the child to be active, to do something, but good results it usually does not. Worries still remain, which then develop into a stress.
The nature of such phrases is clear. Most often they are used to quickly withdraw the child from depression. But it is important to understand that the way he survives this point, what conclusions will affect him and cause a big imprint on his whole life and attitude towards You.
3 . Give the child time. It needs independently of the way the pain, hurt, anger and sadness – to finally accept the situation. But he definitely need to go through all these sufferings. It is an invaluable experience.
4 . Try to explain to the child that love is not only to experience the joy of flight, but also to suffer. A soul that can survive and can admit that she’s in pain, and knows how to love. Such situations prepare the adolescent to future happy relationships, help to understand themselves.
5 . At the time when he will need Your advice on how to survive this, just say, “get over all your suffering, remember them and try to live on.” Be for the child with a secure base that understands and accepts him, gives him time to “cook” in travail. And when he wants to move on, tell me, how will return to a normal life.
How to survive your first love? Time is the best healer!
Support your child. The day will come, and he, along with you will remember this time with a smile. Child will be grateful to you for what you helped him to survive first love, without losing faith in yourself and maintaining a sense of dignity.