Somehow in one of the shows on TV showed the nursing home. Many inhabitants of the house were brought here by their children and left in the care of the state. The headmistress says that gradually, the children rarely visit their parents. At first, the old people are outraged, offended, then accept, i.e., as expected, move on the scale of emotions to apathy and death. And interestingly, for 25 years, her work was never a time that someone said it I raised these children. No one has claimed responsibility!
The situation according to our observations, is very characteristic: every parent believes the duty of children to provide him with the attention, support and care in old age. But you ask those who think so, what they did in the process of bringing to this character trait is caring and consideration for others? Very simple truth is that will create is what you get. Why is it that people voluntarily take on this is not very easy to wear: it is well known that with the elderly harder than with a baby. Only Moody, irritable dad will not put in the corner, not forced to be obedient as a child.
So how justified such an expectation? Let’s try to understand who is who and what should. It is useful to look at the classic analogy: what comes first – the chicken Continue reading
About it in polite society do not speak. Don’t tell over a Cup of coffee, the feeling – or rather, his absence – quickly trying to cover up a polite smile and hide away from prying eyes. «I do not love their parents” sounds like a confession in a terrible crime.
Why this is so
Once we first take offense to dad and mom. Someone brought up in Spartan conditions, someone took out a daily fatigue, someone suffered from neglect and constant employment of parents. Under-loved, unhappy children, who for years harbored resentment, and then just too tired to fight for parental attention, – this one category.
The other – those who had enough of the excessive care and love. Psychologists have many clients who happened to grow up with my mother and grandmother and from experience to experience unbearable heaviness of their love. They dream of escape from the family, but the sense of duty makes to stay. They are constantly taught how to live, what to think, whom to choose as friends. And, barely openevsys, these children run away – first in a student dormitory, then to another city… the country… on another planet. Call out only on holidays and life are already familiar with Continue reading